5 Stars

The Irish are going to be so pissed when the next Irish Potato Famine hits and the rest of us are using potatoes to make pasta for no good reason.

Quick history lesson: The year is 1843. The Irish are living a happy life in sunny old Ireland. People drink their beer, pick their four leaf clovers, and tickle their leprechauns. Big ginger smiles all around. Seems like a pretty good year, right? Out of nowhere, all the potatoes die.

Uh oh. What do Irish people eat? Potatoes. What else do Irish people eat? Nothing. Potatoes, beer, whiskey, and probably some other liquids that can intoxicate you. That’s it. So when the potatoes died, the Irish died with them. By the end of the Irish Potato Famine over 200 million Irish people had starved to death.

That is the entirety of Irish history summed up in two simple paragraphs. This site is like Wikipedia but not boring.

So quite understandably, Ireland is very protective over its potatoes these days. We all know what will happen if their spuds vanish again. Death. Despair. Pubs with a whole lot of options crossed off their menus.

Do the rest of us care how close Ireland is to complete and utter destruction? Nope. We hoard as many potatoes as we can. We make gnocchi. Could we just make pasta out of wheat and water instead? Easily. When Ireland falls we will have only ourselves to blame.

So the next time you eat gnocchi, please keep in mind that you are a giant racist.



Why The Irish Hate Gnocchi
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One thought on “Why The Irish Hate Gnocchi

  • March 20, 2018 at 4:37 pm
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    Irish vegan here, this is absolutely gas

    Reply

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