5 Stars

mushroomfarmThe gods have graced us with a bountiful harvest this year. Which deities do you pray to when growing mushrooms out of a box? Make sure you pick a good one. Ireland is predominately Roman Catholic and that got them nothing but a potato famine.

Finding the right god to help your mushrooms grow correctly can be harder than you would think. There are just so many options out there, and some deities tend to get overly jealous if you try to worship more than one.

An unhealthy amount of my religious knowledge comes from Game of Thrones, where it is common to pray to the old gods and the new. Personally, I believe the old gods are outdated and cannot be trusted to provide divine intervention for your mushroom farm. I have little faith that the old gods could even help you grow an avocado in a bucket.

The only divine being I trust to answer my prayers is Durga. Look at all the arms on that Goddess. Holy heck, she has ten of them. That is more arms than most religious figures combined.

I bet she’s the queen of multitasking. While your puny run of the mill gods are struggling to pull off a single miracle, Durga is over here cooking breakfast, tying her shoes, writing a novel, spearing that same poor bastard in the chest again, and making some plentiful mushrooms grow out of a cardboard box for me all at the same time. Talk about getting some bang for your buck. But seriously, I wonder what that poor dude even did to incur Durga’s stabby wrath.

Mushroom Farm in a Box
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