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caterpillarI’m only going to say this once. It is not appropriate to eat a caterpillar at any stage in its life. Only a real sicko would even contemplate doing such a thing, and I sincerely hope you do not fall under that category.

Do not eat a caterpillar when it’s happily crawling about on leaves. I would not be the slightest bit surprised if Hitler ate caterpillars, and you do not want to be like Adolf. Caterpillar eating is a slippery slope towards Nazism. So the next time you’re feeling hungry and spy one of these young creatures please take a moment to stop and ask yourself if you really want to be responsible for the return of the Third Reich.

Don’t eat a caterpillar when it goes full comatose and turns into a cocoon. Talk about taking candy from a baby. The poor little cripple doesn’t even have tiny legs to defend itself anymore. If you need to make yourself feel like a big man then you can buy an oversized truck like everybody else, but please don’t take out your inner frustrations upon a defenseless cocoon.

And if any of you perverts even think about eating a majestic butterfly then I hope karma hits you like a ton of bricks. Butterflies are vengeful creatures and I believe they would also wish this fate upon you. Only Eliza Thornberry knows for sure.

The United Nations has suggested that we should eat butterflies and other insects to help fight world hunger. Maybe we should eat the United Nations and see how they like it.

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